One of them is crying. Another is screaming on your left ear. Your spouse is yelling on your right ear.

What will you do? 

What’s your next step?

Here are a few methods you can try to use if you found yourself caught in between these situations.

Stay calm.

Your child will need your help to cope with the feelings and frustrations whenever he or she is angry. As a parent, don’t get angry at your child for being upset.

When children are mad and out of sorts, it’s a challenge not to get angry ourselves as a parent. Never be intimidated by the situation. Relax, take a deep breath and think wisely.

If you get angry too, then it will create even more confusion not only for you and your child, but also anyone who’s watching what’s happening.

Accept angry feelings as natural.

As a parent, understanding that your child is upset, frustrated, or simply mad is the first step to a productive solution. Many parents have trouble expressing even their own anger. And when the child is angry, the parent’s confusion gets mixed in.

Then instead of feeling mad and getting over it, the commotion stretches out. That’s indirectly saying that trouble is looming.

Put words on the feelings.

Anger is a call for help. Whenever the children are angry, they need you to set limits for their behavior while also understanding the feelings that are causing the uproar.

Again, you must never, never get angry when your children are angry. That just makes things even worse!

Teach them about angry feelings and boundaries.

Make your children realize the limits they can go whenever they feel angry. Talk to them what they can do and what they cannot do when they’re angry.

Say something like: “It’s okay to feel mad, but it is not okay to punch your brother.” or “It’s natural to be upset, but it is not okay to throw your books.”

You can find more detailed information about how to teach yourself and your child about anger management in my guide, Child Anger Revealed which is available at http://www.ManageYourChild.com/1 .

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2. How to Teach Your Angry Child About Anger Management
3. Anger Management Tips for Angry Parents

Here are six ways to identify pesky hot buttons and unplug them once and for all.

STEP 1 – Watch Out for Overreacting

When you’re agitated and overreacting to a small event, take a step back and keep cool. Before you punch a hole in the wall or throw a vase across the room, go for a walk until your mind stops racing. Then before you open your mouth and spout words you’ll soon regret, answer this question: What is upsetting me?

STEP 2 – Look Inward

Everyday events can trigger emotionally charged reactions that appear out of the blue. You can avoid arguments if you first look at your upset. Emotional triggers may be tied to past rejections, hurts, fears and unmet needs. Your hot buttons can be brought on by stress, depression or worry.

When anger is out of proportion to the incident, the tendency is to point your finger and blame the other person. If you’re honest with yourself, you may find that the problem is in you and that’s good news because then you can fix it.

STEP 3 – Tie Up Loose Ends

Emotional loose ends are those nagging unexpressed resentments, hurts and unresolved conflicts that stand between you and another person or your beloved. Lashing out make things worse. When you tie up emotional loose ends that set you off, you pave the way for peace.

Tying up loose ends keeps your relationships safe, calm and thriving. Are there past hurts and disappointment that you need to address? Are you carrying a grudge? Do you need to apologize and make amends? Do you need to let go and forgive?

STEP 4 – Accentuate the Positive

When you look for the positive, you start from a position that a mistake wasn’t caused by intentions to hurt you. You understand that we all make mistakes. The other person has triggers too.

STEP 5 – Assume the Very Best

There are complicated reasons why any particular behavior occurs.The person who pushed your buttons may be having a bad day because their sensitive buttons were set off. Before you assume the worst, imagine the best. Take a deep breath, inquire about what is going on and wait for an explanation. Chances are when you understand what’s troubling the other person, you’ll feel compassion.

STEP 6 – Make a Generous Offer

When buttons are pushed, angry fevers run high and the tendency is to get stubborn, defensive and smug. Hot buttons get overactivated when you won’t back down. If you’re convinced that you’re right and everyone else is at fault, nothing can be accomplished.

A stalemate doesn’t allow for resolution. There is no progress if you refuse to budge. Be the hero by bridging the gap. Reach out and say, “You might be right.”

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The problem is that every day things happen to us that bring out our anger. So it’s critical that we learn to keep our temper under control. We need to do this for ourselves, and we need to do this so that our children can learn from our example.

Here are 7 simple straight forward techniques you can use that will keep anger under control.

Get away from the situation

Just walk away whenever you feel that your anger is coming when you are in a upsetting or frustrating situation. You can just excuse yourself or do whatever you can do leave the situation for a moment. The reason you would want to do this is because when you’re away from the situation, whatever you do will not have any influence on the people around you.

You’re by yourself and no one will know that you’re upset. You won’t be able to say anything or do anything that you are going to regret later. If you want to control your anger and limit the damage that it can do, walking away is a great first step.

Diffuse your anger

One of the best ways I know that can diffuse your anger is to get physical. I don’t mean by hitting your kids. You should never do that when you’re full of anger. Some parents still do that as it is one of the destructive ways they can diffuse their anger.

What I mean is to engage in some form of vigorous physical activities. You can go for a walk, a run, lift weights, or do something else physical that will diffuse your emotions and get your mind off the problem. This will help you cool down. It will also give you some of the best work outs that you will ever have.

Get regular exercise

Did you know that strenuous exercise is a great technique to manage your anger and increase you tolerance threshold? Getting regular vigorous exercise has a lot of advantages. You will feel younger and healthier. You will look better. You will also be able to dissipate the effects of the daily nagging frustrations that tend to add up over the course of the day.

These minor irritations tend to build up and eat away at you until even a small incident can get you angry. By just setting up a regular exercise routine, you will find that things will not bother you quite as much and you will be much less prone to anger.

Keep calm

You can control anger if you can find a way to stay calm and relaxed throughout the day. There are many relaxation techniques you can use to stay calm and have positive ‘down time’. Some of the more popular activities are yoga, deep breathing exercises, meditation, and so on.

Laugh of your heart out

Try to look at what is happening as if it were happening to someone else. Many times if you look at the difficult situations you are experiencing as an outsider would, what is happening will seem quite ludicrous. You can infuse humor in difficult situations and laugh at them rather than get offended or angry.

Judge favorably

Most people who do things that anger you are not doing them maliciously. Usually if the person knew he was doing something to bother you, he wouldn’t do it at all. The problem is that none of us weigh out how our actions effect others. What seems to you as a person who is inconsiderate and uncaring is probably someone who is just unaware that what he is doing is bothering you. Since in most cases the person who is doing something to you really means no offense, there is no reason for you to take offense.

You should view most actions that bother or offend you as an oversight rather than a direct attack. If you do that, you will almost always be correct.

Be silent

Words said in anger can cause a great deal of harm. What you say may be something you truly feel or may be something that you are just saying to hurt your attacker. Either way, it will usually be something that is not very palatable. Be careful of the words that come out of your mouth when you are angry. When you calm down you will probably have to eat them.

You should try to use some or all of these anger management techniques and tips yourself and teach them to your children. They will help you and your family members control your anger and prevent you from damaging your relationships.

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2. How to Teach A Child Anger Management
3. How to Teach Your Angry Child About Anger Management

To teach your child about anger management, it all starts with YOU.

• You need to have total control of your own anger..
• You need to know the RIGHT thing to do when you’re in a difficult situation.
• You need to know how to ‘think outside the box’ when you’re angry.

I know it’s hard. It was hard for me, and other parents as well.
Take one small step at a single time, and you’ll start to see results, eventually.

Have you wondered waht you CAN do when you’re in difficult situations with your children? Those siatuations where both parties are angry, aggressive and doesn’t seem to care anything else but to let go their anger.

Here’s what you can do..

1. Try to accept and recognize the problem

For some, this might be difficult. I don’t know about you though, but I found it hard last time.

This is probably because we are afraid to receive negative feed backs from other people or we are too upset that we do not seem to realize that we are indeed angry.

Either way, it is very important to initially accept and recognize that you are struggling with anger management so that you will realize what should be done and what are the solutions to prevent the possible effects.

2. Identify the root and cause of YOUR anger

Once you have recognized and accepted that you’re angry, the next important thing you should do is to identify why you are angry.

This would help you to concentrate on specific solutions that would directly solve your problem first.

Did you know that by knowing the root and cause of your anger, it would also let you know how to stay away from things that would set off your anger.

3. Letting IT go

Many parents tend to rehash previous things and events that caused them pain and anger. For example, their child’s behavior. You must learn how to let things go, otherwise you’ll start accumulating bad memories and experiences about your children.

This is very dangerous since the pain and suffering from the past could easily set off anger even from the simplest things. Make sure you let go, forgive, and then forget the things your children did last time that would have hurt you before.

4. Diversion
Your anger can cause you and others around you harm, read : your children. It is all right to express anger but be careful with this. Once the expression goes beyond your control, anger becomes bad.

What you should do is to divert all your anger into more productive activities.

Just always keep in mind that an angry person tends to become stronger as he normally is. Doing something harmless and acceptable is the best way to apply that strength.

5. Communicate well with your family

Whenever you’re angry, the is a very high tendency is for you to lose control of yourself. Once this happens, you might not be aware of every word or every action that come out from you.

What can you do then?

Try to exercise on how to communicate well. Remember to always keep yourself in control of your situation. Good communication within the family will lead to understanding what is really happening. Communicating well would also
make you listen to others as well as thinking well, and declaring yourself well on different scenarios where others lose it.

6. Just take it easy

This does not mean that you laugh off your anger, just take it nice and easy. Breathe and try to relax your whole body. If I’m to put this in other words, you are the only person responsible if you will get angry or not.

So, take it nice and easy.

It is much easier to think about the consequences from the possible actions you want to do while succumbing to your anger, than thinking of what you have done wrong after you have calmed down.

Relax, and take it easy.

That’s all YOU should do when you’re angry with your child. I can’t say I practice them all the time, but I always try my best to practice them, in which I hope you will too.

If you find this is very useful to you, I would really appreciate if you could drop me some comments below.

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2. 3 Tips For Parents in Dealing With Child Anger
3. How to Teach A Child Anger Management