Comments on: The Biggest Parenting Myth – Smacking Is Detrimental to Discipline

By: lorrie ann

lorrie ann — Sun, 02 May 2010 04:37:24 +0000

This is so true! So nice to see that this really does do the job when the children are little. To many kids these days think that they run the parents. It was very nice to read this along with all your other very helpful work that you have wrote. Thank you so much Jamie for opening my mind and answering so many of my questions on the way I parent my children.I have known for a long time that the way me and my husband have been dealing with our teens, that we were not really getting anywhere. It seems like when they became teens,they have been testing us even more. I can not thank you enough!!!!!!

By: daniels ayodele

daniels ayodele — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 10:55:15 +0000

To be candid, you are doing a great job with your write up, and I can image how you’ve put smile on some parents’ faces with this, great job. Keep it up.

By: Pam Brooks

Pam Brooks — Sat, 24 Apr 2010 20:05:58 +0000

I have to say “Amen” to your article as a parent of five. Even though ours are grown, we raised ours with the “smack” and it was quick and effective. As you said our children always knew why and what the consequences were so there were no questions. We didn’t beat our children senseless but they knew we needed their attention immediately and were not pleased with said behavior. I believe that parents need to quit redirecting and talking and start acting. Do they realize how long their attention span is at those early years? TAKE ADVANTAGE!!

By: pweber

pweber — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 17:30:55 +0000

As a foster parent I am not allowed to ‘smack’ hands or bottoms – and have to deal with children that lacked proper parenting from birth. But, I truly believe that a simple smack on the hand (or my choice the butt) is very effective when used early in life. You cannot reason with a toddler why it is not in their best interest to do what they want. A firm no is what works. And sometimes a smack on the bottom (which is diapered!..) and redirection gets the point across. consistancy is also an important key, if yesterday it was OK to play with the dust pan it is confusing why they can’t play with it today. The argument that you teach violence or the child fears you only becomes an issue as they get older and a simple smack on the bottom is demeaning – at this point you need to seek other ways. If you raise the babies with love, reassurance, and consistancy they should never be in a position to fear you or to retaliate with violence.

By: Virginia

Virginia — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 16:57:12 +0000

I see value in the use of the Smack with kids who have normal brain function, but what about the behaviorally emotionally disturbed child who will turn it back on you? His idea of “fairness” and treating others as you wnat to be treated comes into play here, too.
How do you handle it when your disabled child uses the Smack on you when you don’t do what he demands? Or uses it on his siblings or other children? This is where modeling the behavior you wnat to see makes a big difference. I don’t like my 11 y.o. son hitting my bottom when he disagrees with what I have said or done. And he keeps a straight face and acts like it is just what I deserve…then what do you do?
The research on how corporal punishment and restraint have been used in schools show that it has been used disproportionally on boys and children with difficult behavior as a part of their diagnosis (included as part of the IEP or other school management education plan). I find the “Plan B” of Dr Ross Greene, PhD (“Lost At School”, “Explosive Child”) using the Collaborative Problem Solving approach to be more successful for these kids.